It’s a natural behavior to want to react to a cue we may recognize and want to confront the person right away. Are you bored? Did I offend you? Did you understand? However, these approaches are not the best solution to connecting with people and better understanding their behavior. When you notice a social cue such as someone rolling their eyes or speaking in a shrill voice, take a moment to stop and review the action. Take notice as to whether it is being directed at you or if others around you are subject to it as well. Does the behavior continue? Maybe the behavior was a onetime occurrence?
Reflect on what you can do to adapt yourself to the situation. Was there something you said to trigger this feeling? Does this person have something they want to share? Maybe you just need to take a step back from this person. Sometimes they need a moment to review and reflect as well and may need some personal space to do it. Whatever your results, remember to refrain from jumping to conclusions about the cues we encounter. Always take a minute to two before responding with your own actions.
Until next time ...
Sheryl Tuchman, SPHR, SHRM-SCP
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